September 5, 2013

I didn't want to wake up today.  I wake up twice in the night to apply more ointment to my eye, and it makes for a tough time sleeping.  We also lost power last night, and N overslept a bit.  Frank was waiting at the front door for his morning potty walk and crying.  I felt so bad for him. 
I wore my mask yesterday to take Frank potty in the afternoon.  I knew my numbers were going up and doctor expected me to be in normal range in a couple days.  We were outside all of five minutes, but it was great, to feel the warmth of the sun.  Now, I just can't wait to eat raw, fresh fruits and vegetables!  Soon, soon, soon, I hope!
Two weeks until my next biopsy.  Its been a struggle, but I think I still have it easier than most people with cancer.  I feel like I am starting to understand my purpose in life a bit more.  I really hope there is someone reading this that is going through cancer or has someone close to them going through it, thinking, this is helping me.  Yep, I'm going to have bad days that suck.  Yep, I'm going to wonder what I did wrong for karma to kick me so hard.  Yep, I have cancer, but this is my warrior training and I will get through this.

My mom told me the other day, "You are so strong Lisa for going through this.  You can do anything now!"  I think she is right.  I think of the song, Stronger by Kelly Clarkson and just sing along and smile.  I am lucky to have my family and N and his family.  They have been rocks for me.  I hope I can be a rock for someone else.