Monday, September 2, 2013

The end of summer

Happy Labor Day.  Its the unofficial end of summer.  Originally, I was hoping to be better by the beginning of summer, and that didn't happen.  Then, I was hoping to be better by August, and now we are in September.  Summer is over, and I'm housebound because my immune system is so low.
I've spent most of my summer stuck inside, with my parents and sister visiting me to take me to the doctor, get blood work, or to let out my dog.  Its been tough, mentally.  I spend more time playing candy crush and checking what everyone is doing on facebook because its interesting, but it also makes me sad sometimes.  I can't go out and do those things.  I can't run a marathon because I am too week and I have three tubes hanging out of my chest.  I can't go to a concert because there are too many people and my immune system can't handle it.  I can't have a cold beer on the back porch or on a boat because I am on too many meds.  That part sucks.

What I can do, is be grateful I am alive.  I am so grateful.  Thank you, God, for helping me heal and giving me each and every day.  I am truly blessed.  Every morning I wake up, and I feel like there is something new going on, sometimes good, sometimes bad.  Yesterday, I felt I had more energy, but I also woke with a pain on my eyelid.  I am sure I am getting a sty, but I see doctor tomorrow and will know more then. 
This is where I tell myself that I am here on this earth to help others and make a difference. I promise God every night when I go to bed I will do good, and when I wake up, I think about how to start (when I'm finally allowed to leave the house).

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